House of Drama

Our house was the "House of Drama" last night!! The day will forever be marked by the first day of school in our new town. I prayed, and prayed, and prayed for this day... yet, it still was a very difficult day for the boys. My heart was breaking.

24 hours later I am humored by each of our unique responses to the stress:

Tanner arrived home mad as a hornet, and wouldn't talk to anyone for awhile. After he and Steve had some quality father-son time, he appeared fine. I knew he was just stuffing his feelings - which is both good and bad.

Tyler arrived home fairly happy, but hit a brick wall at some point and spiraled downward for most of the evening and into the night. I call this Tyler's "drunken-man funk" because everyone knows you can't reason with a drunk man.

I ate every snack food I could get my hands on. Then, I curled up on the couch and slept the discomfort away. This approach is oh, so "effective."

Steve methodically moved from one family member to another trying to be the peacemaker-problem fixer. We are the epitome of opposites attract in these kinds of situations!!

As I processed all of this today, it made me laugh! We humans are strange people - especially when under stress.

Canaan's Fare

Since I don't seem to be finding much time to write complete blogs, I enjoy sharing quotes from my current studies. Here is another from Kelly Minter's No Other Gods (p. 175):

The Lord will not allow us to be in the desert forever. Manna is only for a season. If you are going through a lean time of wafers on your tongue and burning sand beneath your feet, this too shall pass.

Corressponding Scripture is found in Joshua 5:11-12 (NIV):

The manna stopped the day after they ate this food from the land; there was no longer any manna for the Israelites, but that year they ate of the produce of Canaan.

In not leaving us in the desert forever, I must remind myself that God allowed the Israelites to wander in the desert for 40 years! Personally, I get a little impatient with 40 minutes of waiting.... I am thankful for this reminder of God's perfect timing and provision. I KNOW eating Canaan's fare will be worth the wait!!

My Heart in Less Than 40 Words.

I am completing Kelly Minter's Bible study entitled "No Other Gods: Confronting Our Modern Day Idols." It is a great study!! It is thought-provoking and deep, but not so much so that it becomes overwhelming. The final lines read:

With every bend, twist, and dip in the road, we proclaim God faithful. We proclaim Him good. We proclaim Him right. And mostly, we proclaim Him God. As my friend put it, "God with a capital G."

And, that my friends, sums up my heart right now!

Wait for it....

Yesterday and today I have been re-reading pages from my journal. I need a reminder of why we are in the midst of this huge life change. Change is so uncomfortable, and since this particular change appears to revolve around my work, I feel a sense of responsibility for the boys' discomfort (i.e., fears, frustrations, anger....). This move was definitely a joint decision between Steve and me, but I still feel guilty for taking the boys out of their comfort zones at this stage of their lives.

Two specific areas of my journal writing stand out to me. First, much of the outward processing that led to this move began in a small group Bible study that I participated in last summer/fall. Of the 8 women who participated, 3 of us are in the exact same transition today. In July, we moved to Idaho, another family moved to Oklahoma, and a third family moved to Indiana. We studied Esther together by Beth Moore. The following verse will forever be attached to the study and this season of life:

"And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?" Esther 4:14b

I am not in a royal position, but in response to the question that begs an answer -- GOD KNOWS!!! He knew a year ago, and he knows now. He knows what we really need, and what we simply think we need.... He knows!!! I find great peace in believing that God knows.

Second, on November 28, 2009, I wrote the following:

"I have this impression that You (GOD) are preparing us for something different; something that will require us to step out in faith away from our human security. Lord, I am willing; I seek Your will alone. You know us and this world better than we do at any given time. Lord, I trust You. Guide me step-by-step; show me the way."

I don't share this to make me look good. I share this because we need to share our journeys with God; to learn from one another; to see God working in tangible ways. This move is taking me further from my comfort zone than I had anticipated. Sometimes I look to God with some serious questions - especially when it comes to my kids (and our Ohio house sitting empty). I really do believe.... Oh Lord, help my unbelief.

As I re-read my journal from the past year, God's work is clear. We needed this move, and this job to fulfill His purposes on earth. Why? At this point, who knows!?! ...Wait for it... GOD KNOWS!

This Weekend... I

 

• did not prepare any posts for my blog - even though I have lots of thoughts rambling through this head of mine.
• moved into our "temporary, long-term" house. It is the guest house of a friend, and it is on the most beautiful piece of property! I feel spoiled and blessed!!!
• sent the boys to "Warrior Camp" all day, and into the night, on Saturday. It was a good experience for them, and a nice break for me and my parents.
• visited a church for the third time. We are waiting for a word from the Lord as to where we will land.
• shopped at Costco - love it!!
• took my parents out to lunch at Chapala's - yummers!
• had a slumber party in the previous house on Friday night. All 5 of us (plus the dog) slept in the living room. It was the kids' idea....
• Settled into our new place, and started counting the hours until Steve arrives!!!!!

If you want to participate in "This Weekend... I" go here.

This Weekend I....

In honor of my new friend in real life and in blog world, I am initiating a new tradition on my blog:

This weekend, I....

• can't remember what I did.
• Oh, I worked on Saturday....
• took the boys to a new pizza resturant (everything's new when you move).
• tried a new church.
• played with my dad's new i-phone (and coveted it).
• shopped at Macy's Clearance Center with Tyler in tow (it was a short trip).
• cooked at least twice.
• watched Dateline with the boys and my dad (We all went to bed feeling fearful of Shirley.).
• cleaned the bathroom, finished the laundry, and picked up Mandy's poop in the yard (gag!).
• tried really hard to lift the boys' spirits, but realized it is a task that only God can accomplish.

Have a great week - the last one of July 2010!

A Simple Quote

I haven't had time to blog this week, and Internet service is lacking in my current housing, but here is a quote to consider:

Christians, unfortunately, often talk to themselves. We think in ruts, and express ourselves in a familiar kind of family jargon. Unless we understand the thought- and value-patterns of our day, as well as those of biblical revelation and the Christian community, and unless we speak fluently the language of our contemporaries, we tragically limit our effectiveness (Holmes, 1987, p. 5-6).

Holmes, A.F. (1987). The Idea of a Christian College (Revised Ed.). Grand Rapids, MI: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co.